Hey, kids... Come 'n' get your Kung Fu Spex!™

Have you ever wondered what it might have felt like if Bruce Lee had roundhouse kicked you in the head? Well, wonder no more! That super-dizzying sensation can be yours every time you put on a pair of Kung Fu Spex™! A blinding blast from the not-so-distant past, Kung Fu Spex™ were made using the same once-top secret technology developed by scientists in the 1970s to assist CIA agents in nefarious interrogations conducted by the spy agency during the Vietnam War. Who needs LSD, acid, heroin, ecstasy, or any other drug for that matter? Just put on a pair of Kung Fu Spex™ and you'll be down on the floor, drooling like an infant and soaking in your own excrement in no time! Talk about an altered state! To order a pair of your own psychedelic sensation-inducing Kung Fu Spex™ send $9.99 (cash only) to Kung Fu Spex c/o Your Kung Fu Sucks, 4321 Sesame Street, Chicago, IL 60666. (Recommended for adults age 18 years old and up!) 
Note: Kung Fu Spex™ should not be worn while operating heavy machinery, driving, cooking, walking, or during sexual intercourse. Extreme dizziness, vertigo, vomiting, loss of muscle control and temporary memory loss will occur. Guaranteed or your money back! 

Kung Fu Spex™ © 2015 South Side Superflat

No comments: